FAQs
Q: Are the terms Collaborative Process, Collaborative Divorce, and Collaborative Law synonymous?
A: Yes, they all refer to the Collaborative Divorce Model.
Q: My spouse and I are getting a divorce. How does the Collaborative Process work?
A: When you decide on a Collaborative Process, each of you hires an attorney who has been trained in the Collaborative Divorce Model. Everyone agrees in writing not to go to court. You will meet privately and in face-to-face talks with your Collaborative professional team, which may also include family transition specialists, financial professionals and/or child specialists. All meetings are intended to produce an honest exchange of information and clear understanding about needs and expectations, especially concerning the well-being of children when involved. Mutual problem-solving by all parties leads to the final agreement.
Q: How is Collaborative Process different from using the courts?
A: In a court process, the judge will make the final decisions regarding your family and your settlement. In the Collaborative Process, you and your spouse make the decisions that affect your children and your settlement. Unfortunately, if you go to court to reach a decision about your family law matter, you may come to view your spouse as an adversary. The negotiations focus on problems and shortcomings rather than solutions. The resulting conflict can have far-reaching consequences not just for you, but your children. The financial cost of litigation is often outweighed by the emotional and psychological cost. Unlike a court process, the Collaborative Process allows you the opportunity to address emotional issues and consider more creative financial and parenting solutions which might not be available from a judge.
Q: How is Collaborative Process different from mediation?
A: In mediation, a neutral third party helps you and your spouse (with or without attorneys present) to negotiate your settlement. The mediator cannot give legal advice or support one person and not the other. Many people find they need the support and encouragement of having a legal professional guide them. In the Collaborative Process, each party has their own attorney present during negotiations, rather than one neutral mediator helping parties form agreements. Mediation and the Collaborative Process both use alternative dispute resolution techniques to reach agreements and do not involve the courts.
Q: How are mediators involved in the Collaborative Process?
A: Sometimes mediators are used to help facilitate discussion or address difficult issues so the attorneys can focus on supporting their clients.
Q: Who is on a Collaborative Team?
A: A Collaborative team is the combination of professionals that you choose to work with to resolve your dispute. It can be you and your Collaborative attorneys, or you may want to include other professionals on the team. You and your spouse can choose to include other professionals such as neutral financial professionals, family transition specialists (which are mental health professionals), child specialists or others with specialist training in the Collaborative Process. Each family and its needs are unique.
Q: Is there a specific professional I should meet with first?
A: Although most clients tend to meet first with an attorney, you can begin with any professional including our family transition and financial professionals. If you’d like to meet with someone together with your spouse, you may want to look for a professional who has a mediator or family transition designation. This can be especially helpful if you are trying to decide what process might be the best fit.
Next, call one or more of the professionals you would like to meet and have a chat with them. Each professional has a slightly different approach to initial consultations. You’ll want to inquire about that. Some want to meet with you and your spouse together, others by yourself for the first time. Each professional sets his or her own fee.
It’s important that you and your spouse feel comfortable with the professionals you choose. This may mean meeting more than one professional for an initial consultation.
Q: Can my spouse and I be represented by one/the same attorney?
A: No, you and your spouse will each need individual representation. The attorneys you and your spouse select may be members of this or another collaborative practice group, but they cannot both be members of the same firm (that is considered a conflict of interest). If you and your spouse want to work with one professional, choosing a neutral mediator would be the way to do that.
Q: Do we both need to be present for a consultation or only one of us?
A: Since you will need separate representation, only one of you needs to be present for a consultation with an attorney. If you decide to consult with or hire another professional such as a financial neutral or child specialist, that professional may require both parties present for a consultation.
Q: Can I hire a Collaborative attorney if my spouse chooses to hire a non-Collaboratively trained attorney?
A: Yes, depending on that attorney’s practice, but you won’t be utilizing the Collaborative Process unless both attorneys are Collaboratively-trained and you and your spouse have chosen the Collaborative Process.
Q: Can we do the Collaborative Process if I have an attorney and my spouse doesn’t?
A: No. One hallmark of the Collaborative Process is that each party is represented by a Collaboratively-trained attorney.
Q: Do my children need an attorney?
A: No, your children do not need an attorney. However, you and your spouse may decide that adding a child specialist, who can meet with your children and represent their “voice” and needs, may assist you in making the best decisions for your children and family.
Q: Do both parties have to agree to use a mediator/other Collaborative professional?
A: Yes, typically both parties agree on which shared professionals to use. However, one party may choose to work with a family transition specialist while the other does not.
Q: Is the Collaborative Process appropriate if one party has mental health issues?
A: Mental health issues will add a layer of complication no matter the process the parties elect. Collaborative professionals are trained in non-confrontational negotiation, helping to keep discussions productive. The parties may choose to add a mental health professional, such as a family transition specialist, to the team to provide additional support for the parties and process, which may have a greater likelihood of success than an adversarial approach. The Collaborative Process works best when the parties are able to communicate directly with each other and the team.
Q: How long will my Collaborative Process take?
A: There is no average divorce or timeframe. The length of time it takes to complete your divorce depends on a number of factors including the complexity of your situation, the amount and intensity of the conflict between the spouses, and the motivation and engagement of each party in the process.
Q: Does the Collaborative Process take longer than going to court?
A: As mentioned above, there is no “average” timeframe. However, the Collaborative Process can often be more direct and efficient than standard attorney representation or litigation. By focusing on problem-solving instead of blame and grievances, there is a real opportunity to achieve respectful results. And since you settle out of court, there’s no wait for the multiple court dates or extensions involved in litigation. Experience shows Collaborative Process cases generally take less time than litigated cases, especially in jurisdictions where there are delays in accessing the courts.
Q: Is the Collaborative Process more expensive than “regular” representation?
A: There is no “average” cost to a divorce, as it depends on a number of factors such as the complexity of the issues, the level of conflict between the parties, the number of court appearances, and other myriad factors. However, the Collaborative Process is often less expensive than traditional litigation because full disclosure and open, team-based communication ensure that issues are covered in a timely manner.
Q: What are the key elements of Collaborative Process?
A: (1) A voluntary, free and open exchange of information. The best decisions will always be fully informed. The Collaborative Process involves disclosing all relevant information necessary to make good decisions, not hiding it.
(2) A genuine commitment and pledge not to go to court. You, your spouse and the professionals make a written commitment to strive only for settlement. That means that if a party decides the process no longer works for them, their attorney will withdraw and they will need to find litigation counsel. This helps to ensure that the professionals’ motivations align with yours. They have no incentive to make things contentious or worse - in fact, doing so could lead to failure of the process and their termination. It also alleviates fear of the other spouse’s attorney ever taking you on in court - they literally cannot. This means the focus during the Collaborative Process is solely on helping you reach an agreement.
(3) A balanced commitment to respect both parties’ shared goals and the needs of the whole family. The Collaborative Process is centered on finding resolutions that take into account the things that are important to each of you. Throughout the process, Collaborative professionals will assist you and your spouse to clarify your interests, refine your priorities, and think creatively to find durable solutions that work for both of you.
Q: What if I don’t get along with my spouse?
A: Strong feelings about the relationship and dysfunctional communication are normal post-separation. Those big emotions don’t change the fact that each of you has a common goal of resolving the issues without a costly, destructive court battle. The Collaborative Process helps you stay focused and communicate effectively so you and your spouse can work successfully to resolve your outstanding issues. A family transition specialist can be a helpful member of the Collaborative Team to help the parties learn skills to manage their strong feelings and communicate effectively.
The guiding principles of the Collaborative Process are respect, dignity, openness and fairness. This respectful tone encourages you to show compassion, understanding, and cooperation. The goal of the Collaborative Process is to build a settlement on areas of agreement, not to perpetuate disagreement.
Extreme hostility/abuse/or domestic violence are situations that would likely be more appropriate in a traditional court-involved divorce process, as basic safety, transparency, and goodwill are necessary components of the Collaborative Process.
Q: How does the Collaborative process support families/reduce stress on children?
A: It is parental conflict that harms children – not separation or divorce. The Collaborative Process offers a way for you to reach agreements about your finances and children that are non-adversarial. The dispute resolution process fosters open communication and encourages healthy ways of addressing conflict. If you want to divorce in a way that will enable you to remain effective co-parents and fosters a cooperative co-parenting relationship post-divorce, the Collaborative Process is one of the best options available.
Q: Is Collaborative the right process if my spouse and I have agreed upon all issues and simply need documents prepared?
A: The Collaborative Process may not be needed in that scenario. However, attorneys often identify overlooked issues while drafting the legal documents, which may require additional consideration or negotiation. Collaboratively-trained attorneys will frequently consult with clients without full representation if the issues are discreet.
Q: Is the Collaborative Process a good option for preparation of prenuptial agreements?
A: Yes, Collaborative is a great process to use for preparation of prenuptial agreements.
Q: Is the Collaborative Process a good option for unmarried parents with custody issues, or domestic spouses seeking dissolution of their partnership?
A: Yes, so long as both parties agree to and are committed to the process, the Collaborative Process is a great option.
Q: I have looked at the website and identified the professionals I would like to talk to or meet with. How do I schedule a consultation?
After locating the professional(s) you would like to meet with, click on their individual page on our website https://pdxcollaborativedivorce.com/pcd-professionals and complete the inquiry fields to submit a request on their page or email them directly at the email address shown to the right of their picture.